JA Farms

#Shoftek!

ROYAL DECREE OF LORD FARQUAAD By order of His Majesty, Ruler of Duloc, Pepper Beard the First, Slightly Taller Than Advertised

WHEREAS on this fifteenth day of November, in the year of our Lord 2026, a certain cowgirl, known throughout the land as Sassy Sue, did boldly declare His Majesty to be “annoying”;

WHEREAS said cowgirl was formally invited to take back this statement and did, in an act of open rebellion, refuse;

WHEREAS His Majesty has never once been annoying, talking until he gets his way, which is hereby declared charming;

IT IS THEREFORE ORDERED THAT:

The word “annoying” is officially banned from the Kingdom of Duloc and all surrounding pastures.
The cowgirl shall retract her statement immediately, or within a reasonable time after feeding the horses, whichever comes first.
Should she refuse, she shall be sentenced to one full day of being complimented by His Majesty, with no sarcasm permitted in response.
Prison Kitty, Duke, and Ta’kya are hereby appointed royal witnesses and shall ensure compliance.
Any mention of His Majesty’s height shall be considered treason.

FAILURE TO COMPLY may result in the royal court sending a 100-pound puppy, a tiny white assassin, and a fanged tree frog to deliver this decree in person. Signed and sealed this day, Lord Farquaad (Pepper Beard the First)